Dear editor

Letter to the editor:

Dear so-called reporter,

I find your recent article about my barking habits truly objectable.
I'm appalled by your so-called investigative reporting, which I would call snooping. Your peddling into other dogs lives has destroyed my life and reputation that I've worked so hard at establishing over the last year.

Because of your story, all the headway I had made in establishing my authority over my backyard has vanished overnight.

First thing this morning, the cat was back. She was standing just beyond my reach, taunting me by rolling around in the grass undisturbed.

And the birds, which I just managed to stop from flying over the yard without first obtaining a fly-over permission, were flying around, congregating in the trees and chirping happily just like I wasn't there!!!!

Thanks a lot.

A year of hard work and barking all for nothing."